Spilt Milk(shake)
by ToiletBrushCat
Summary: A series of non-chronological incidents in which Kuroko's milkshake is spilt ... - ... Incident 5: After a long, exhausting training session all Kuroko Tetsuya wants is to enjoy his favourite Vanilla Milkshake from Maji's. But new to the team, Kise has not yet learnt there are certain rules regarding the Miracle's Phantom. The most important of which: NEVER spill his milkshake!
1. Incident 5

**Uploaded:** **28/11/2015**

 **Updated: 15/02/2016**  
Some spelling mistakes corrected and status changed from complete to ongoing.

Wow! Colour me (and hopefully all you readers) impressed! Two chapters in one day!

Admittedly both of them were sitting there half complete for some time…

But anyways: Enjoy this little oneshot :D

 **Spilt Milk(Shake)  
Incident 5 - Kise**

"Eeeeh! Akashicchi's so scary!" Kise exclaimed, slinging his arms around Aomine and Kuroko's shoulders.

I had been a long gruelling training session under their captain's watchful gaze and the three Teikō students had gone to their local Maji-Burger for some much needed down time. They had stayed till near closing time and were now all on their way home, walking in the same direction down a suburban street.

"Kise..." Aomine snarled, throwing the blonde's arm away from him. Kuroko's visage remained as blank as ever as he continued to slurp his vanilla milkshake up the straw.

"Aominecchi's so mean!" The copy-cat faked a sob and threw his entire weight into little Kuroko and clung to him. As if in slow motion the vanilla milkshake slipped from the pale boy's hand. It hit the pavement, the lid popped off and the thick creamy substance seeped out onto the ground. "Ah, sorry Kurokocchi!"

A heavy silence fell over them for a few moments.

"T-Tetsu'... I-I'll buy you another one?" Aomine offered suddenly looking very nervous and he backed away a little from his little shadow.

"Maji-Burger's will be shut by now." The blonde said matter of fact. "I'll buy you one tomorrow Kurokocchi!" He said turning to the boy who was still staring down at his spoilt drink, his eyes shadowed by his bangs. Kise went to cling to the boy again but Aomine placed a shaking hand on his shoulder.

"I-I'd suggest we run..." He muttered lowly.

"Eh? But Kurokocchi-" He was cut off when his hand that had been about to grab Kuroko was caught in an iron grip.

" _ **Vanilla milkshake is my favourite Kise-Kun**_ " Came Kuroko's monotone voice, but something in the tone sent a shiver down both Aomine and Kise's backs.

"Erm Kurokocchi, that hurts..." Kise hesitantly said, wincing as the shadow's hand only clench tighter around his wrist. "Aominecchi?" Kise questioned anxiously but turned to find the other gone.

" _ **~...** **my favourite...~**_ " Kuroko repeated his eyes glinting dangerously as his other arm drew back in the familiar stance for his infamous Ignite Pass.

"W-wait, Kurokocchi! What are you- Kuroko! Kur-"

Kise's scream echoed throughout the streets.

 **-Incident 5-**

Aomine observed the blonde's fate from the shadows of a nearby alley he had retreated to when he realised there was nothing more he could do for the copy-cat. He watched as Kuroko stood over the slumped body for a few moments and then walked away with a black aura still leaking out into his immediate surroundings. The empty milkshake cup was crushed under his foot on departure.

Waiting a little longer to make sure his shadow was truly gone he stepped out into the late afternoon sun and hurried to the downed Kise's side.

"Oi..." He nudged the blonde with the toe of his trainers but only received a whimper for his troubles. The tanned teen pulled his phone out his pocket hit #2 on his speed dial and held the device up to his ear.

It was answered on the second tone.

"Daiki." The voice demanded.

"A-Akashi... we've got a problem." The menacing silence from the other end demanded a proper explanation. "Kise spilt Tetsu's milkshake... his _vanilla_ milkshake."

A long suffocating pause.

"I see... Casualties?"

"Kise."

"Only the one?" Akashi sounded surprised at the figure.

"Yeah, I erm... hid?"

"I see." The redhead repeated and Aomine could hear his captain's amusement at his cowardice. "Where are you now?"

"A couple of streets over from Maji-Burger."

"Keep Kise out of the open, we don't want to cause a scene. We'll meet you at the park." The red head hung up and Aomine gritted his teeth in frustration.

He nudged Kise with his foot once more hoping to get a better response this time, but upon another wheezing whimper he sighed in dejected acceptance. Kneeling down to grab an ankle he proceeded to drag the Small Forward into the alley from which he came and took the longer but far less travelled route to the down town park.

When he arrived Midorima and Murasakibara were already there, the giant munching through a bag of crisps and the shooter browsing through what Aomine suspected were tomorrow's horoscopes on his phone.

Upon his arrival the two glanced up, took in Kise's unresponsive state and proceeded to ignore it.

"You don't happen to know why we're here, do you?" The greenhead questioned, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"Sure do," Aomine began, letting go of Kise's leg and letting it drop to the floor ruthlessly. "This moron went and spilt Tetsu's _milkshake_."

Midorima froze mid way through fixing his glasses whilst Murasakibara actually stopped _eating_.

"Kuro-chin is scary without milkshake." He mumbled, his lower lip trembling and his crisp free hand grasping his stomach in phantom pain.

"Indeed." Midorima agreed, glaring down at the insentient blonde, similarly nursing his hands.

"That's why we are going to have to stop him." Startled the three protégée turned to find their captain had arrived. "Before it ends up like last time..." He mumbled, an indiscernible shiver ran up his spine, but the other's certainly noticed his hands brush across his eyes.

"Maji's will be shut by now..." Aomine unhelpfully repeated Kise's earlier observation.

"Certainly it will, but desperate times call for desperate measures." Akashi pulled out his phone hit #1 on his speed dial.

He then put the devise to his ear.

The pause was deafening.

"Ah, father. Is mother home?" The redhead enquired. "...Hello mother... Yes, I am fine... I apologise, I will not be home till late... I need to ask a favour... Do you still keep in contact with that friend that owns the commercial brand Maji...?"

 **-Incident 5-**

The Generation of Miracles followed the trail of destruction, having left and unconscious Kise to fend for himself back at the park.

The first sign they were on their sixth man's trail had been two brutish boys lying face down in a street basketball court. Upon questioning a couple of youths playing around their unconscious forms they confirmed they had been rescued by a vengeful ghost.

The next unusual sign they had come across was a little old lady standing over a man already passed out on the ground, hitting his repeatedly with her walking stick with a strangely terrifying satisfied smirk stretching her lips.

"Such a lovely boy, he was." She explained upon being questioned. "This man," she jabbed the downed figure viciously with her stick," grabbed my bag," she clutched the shoulder bag closer to herself at the thought, "and then he was on the ground and the boy handed it back to me. And he certainly had the right idea when he suggested I teach the man a lesson he won't soon forget…"

The Generation of Miracles were quick to retreat from the lady whom 'Dark Kuroko' had brush off on.

A scream up ahead let them know they were not far behind now, but when they reached the next incident they were too late once more to catch up with their Sixth Man.

This time they were shocked to see they knew the victim.

"Hanamiya Makoto." Akashi stated, eyeing the downed form of the player with some sympathy leaking into his gaze, despite their lack of comradery on a court.

"So, what did ya do to set of Tetsu'?" Aomine questioned bluntly.

They only received a whimper.

"He thought he'd make fun of some kid trying to shoot." A voice said from behind them. "So what brings Akashi Seijuro and his little team of miracles to this side of town?" They turned to see Imayoshi, a third year of a rival school and teammate of Hanamiya, leaning against a tree beside the street court.

"That 'kid' was an angry phantom…" Akashi admitted.

"Kuro-Chin's scary when his milkshake's taken away." Murasakibara pipped up, he was unusually solemn and not eating from his supply of snacks despite still having several packs in his school satchel.

"My, you Miracles are a strange bunch… Well, regardless, your little monster of a phantom went that way." He pointed vaguely to a path leading away. "Oi, get up. I warned you that boy shouldn't be messed with…" He kicked his downed teammate harshly and Aomine couldn't help but see the similarities to him and Kise earlier that evening… It was a bad day indeed when you found yourself to be similar to the player whose personality was viewed as the worst…

 **-Incident 5-**

As the Generation of Miracles continued on they were surprised to find no more destruction paving the path they took. Instead it was eerily quiet, not even the sounds of nature prevailing in the unnatural calm.

"We must be getting close." Akashi voiced all their thoughts. They continued, that is until Aomine walked into something.

"Ooomph!" Whatever he had walked into fell to the ground and it took several long moments for the Generation of Miracles' eyes to focus onto their increasingly irate Phantom. At which point they all balked and took several steps away from his downed, dark form, sending prayers for Aomine's soul.

" _ **~Did no one teach you to watch where you're going~?**_ " The boy questioned his light, looking up his eyes cold but face still eerily blank. He rose to his feet.

"I-I-I-I-" Aomine found himself unable to do much more than stutter.

" _ **~Well~?**_ " The monotonous voice was anything but unemotional as despite the lack of any infliction the Phantom's anger leaked out. It only added to the Generation of Miracles' terror.

The shadow's hand suddenly shot out to grip the Power Forward's wrist and Aomine whimpered pathetically as his teammates wrote him off as a goner and backed away further.

But before things could escalate further a ring tone sounded in the quiet atmosphere. The cheerful tone distracted the Phantom from his kill and instead, without releasing Aomine, he reached with his free hand into his pocket, pulling out his ringing phone.

" _ **~Hai~**_ " He stated as he answered, and in the silence the Generation of Miracles could make out the other end of the conversation.

"Tetsu'! Why so formal?" A cheerful voice responded. They flinched, already predicting the dark Kuroko to be far from pleased with the person at the other end.

" _O-Ogiwara-Kun?_ " They blinked, eyes going wide as their Phantom's lip actually quivered.

"Moshi moshi, Tetsu'-Chan!"

"Ogiwara-Kun!"

"Now: what's upset my Tetsu'-Chan?" The disembodied voice darkened and suddenly the Generation of Miracles found their selves incredibly glad they were not meeting this caller in person.

"They spilt my milkshake, Ogiwara-Kun." The Phantom actually sniffled leaving his teammates gaping.

"Shhh, Tetsu'-Chan, it's okay…" The caller soothed the boy. "Pass the phone to the meanies?"

With another sniffle Kuroko handed the phone to Aomine and let go of the boy's wrist. The other Generation of Miracles observed him grow paler and paler from whatever he was told before shakily handing the phone back to his shadow and slumping to his knees in a quivering mess.

"Tetsu'-Chan~!" They heard the caller practically sing as the Phantom held the device back to his ear. "Give 'em hell!" The evil smirk was evident in his voice and the shadow hung up before turning to his teammates, the dark aura back in full force.

"W-wait!" Akashi shouted, only serving to draw Kuroko's attentions upon himself. "Tetsuya, I've got something for you!" He tried but Kuroko just continued to advance. "Another milkshake! I've got you another milkshake!" He gasped out at last as Kuroko's hand drew back in the familiar form of his Ignite Pass…

The Phantom paused, tilted his head enquiringly and, most importantly of all, the dark aura shrank a little.

"~ _Another milkshake~?_ " He questioned blandly.

"Another _Vanilla_ milkshake." Akashi confirmed cautiously.

" _From Maji's_?"

"From Maji's." Again the redhead confirmed. He reached into his school satchel and removed a plastic cup and straw from a small cooler. Handing it to the Phantom, they all watched in anticipation and then Kuroko took a sip.

For a long moment everyone stood still, frozen in time, and then ever so slowly the dark aura that seemed to permeate from Kuroko's being receded back inside and before them stood an entirely blank emotionless Kuroko they all knew and certainly loved over his milkshake deprived self.

Kuroko took another sip and turned from his teammates, heading off in the direction Akashi knew to be his home.

"Milkshake incident number five averted." Akashi stated and the others of the Generation of Miracles relaxed and let out relieved sighs. "Instigator: Kise Ryota. Casualties: Five…" He observed Aomine's still shaking form on the ground. "Six." He corrected himself. "Overall, the lowest count of victims yet." He congratulated his fellow basketball players. "I expect you all bright and early for morning practice tomorrow." He concluded.

Neatening his appearance from his earlier close call with the Phantom he walked away, in the opposite direction Kuroko had taken despite it being the long route home..

"Now to find this 'Ogiwara-Kun' and properly punish him for antagonising an already angry phantom..."

* * *

Please Review!

 **[Update]**!This is no longer a Oneshot. I am now creating further chapters of this due to popular request! **[Update]**


	2. Incident 7

**Uploaded:** **04/05/2016**

 **Summary:** Seirin though they had the single sane Miracle. Until Kagami spilt his milkshake…

Thank you to the following for the reviews on Incident 5.  
 _Guest_ ; _Anonymousreader_ ; Naveesha; belncaz; ScarletAkiChin; Daygon Yuuki; Kurokshiroryuu; Cafuchi; Azure Kuroyuki; Akakuro Karmagisa; Rin1730.

This Oneshot has now become a multi-chaptered series of non-chronological 'Incidents'. Please enjoy :)

 **Spilt Milk(shake)  
Incident 7 – Kagami**

"Moshi Moshi~!"

"Kise!? Kise you've gotta help us!"

"Kagamicchi-?"

"Oh God! Shh! Shh! He'll hear us!"

"What? Kagamicchi? What's going on?"

" _ **~Kagami-Kun~**_ "

Kise dropped his phone. His hands were trembling and eyes impossibly wide. He had not heard that voice using that particular tone in nearly a year. To this day he still had nightmares…

"Oi, Kise?" Kasamatsu, his captain, was there. They had been taking a short break from practice when Kise had answered his phone and started acting strange. He looked torn between helping the ghostly pale model sit down, and giving him a good kick in the back to snap him out of whatever funk he was in. "Kise?" He tried again but his Kohai remained in a catatonic like state.

Kaijō's captain sighed heavily and bent down to pick up the dropped phone. Hoping for answers he held the device to his ear but although the line was open all he heard was static. Frowning he hung up.

"Oi! Snap out of it!" He gave the model his trademark kick in the back only for his Kohai to wilt to the floor as unresponsive as before.

"Erm… captain…?" Moriyama asked. The Kaijō team was used to Kise's antics by now but this did not seem like one of his attention seeking ploys. "What do we do?"

Kasamatsu considered Kise's downed form for a moment before sighing heavily and attempting to redial the last call on his phone…

"…No reply." He sighed again and began to scroll through the blonde's contracts. He quickly skipped over 'Akashicchi' and selected the next name on the list with his Kohai's affectionate suffix.

"Who are you calling?" Moriyama questioned.

"Tōō. That Aomine should know what to do…"

A woman's voice picked up.

"Moshi Moshi~! Dai-Chan's phone~!"

"Ah… This is Kasamatsu Yukio of Kaijō High…" The captain stuttered out.

"Oh, Kasamatsu-san, it's Momoi. How can I help? Is Kise-Kun okay?"

"That's the thing, Momoi-san. Kise got a call from Kagami from Seirin a few minutes ago but… he kind of froze…?"

"Kise-Kun froze?" Momoi sounded worried. "Oi! Dai-Chan! Give it back!" Her voice faded out.

"Oi. What's up with Kise?" Aomine asked having taken his phone back.

"I don't know. He got a phone call and froze."

"Who called?"

"Kagami from Seirin."

"…What's he look like?"

"Urm… Red hair, tall, bit wild…" Kasamatsu was honestly a bit confused it was well known that Tōō's power forward had a strong rivalry with Seirin's player of the same position.

"No, you moron. What does Kise look like?" Kasamatsu flushed but quickly answered.

"Pale. Very pale. And shaking too. He's clutching at his stomach… _Oi if you're gonna be sick, go to the toilets!_ " He shouted at the model. He heard a sharp intake of breath from the phone. "Aomine-san?"

"Momoi." The Tōō player did not seem to have heard him. "Situation: Spilt Milkshake. Call the others."

"H-Hai!" The line went dead.

"…Spilt milkshake…?" He question aloud. A whimper broke through his thoughts and he turned to see Kise had moved to curl himself into a ball.

 **-Incident 7-**

"Satsuki?"

"Akashi-kun! Situation: Spilt Milkshake!"

"…I see… Casualties?"

"Unknown. It seems Kise-Kun got a disturbing call from Kagami-Kun. Dai-Chan figured out what was going on from what his captain told us."

"So Ryōta is still traumatised from incident five? He will be of no use to us then… Contact Shintarō. Atsushi is still in Akita and will not get here in time, but I am in the area on business. We will meet outside Seirin High."

"Hai!"

Akashi hung up and sighed heavily. It had been almost a year since the last incident back in Teikō. He had thought, _hoped_ , that with Kuroko no longer directly under his control the incidents would no longer be his responsibility. However even he was not so cruel as to leave the people of Tokyo to the mercies of an angry phantom.

Especially when he was currently one of them.

He sighed again and turned to the men who were waiting on him in the boardroom.

"I apologise for the disruption." He stated and started packing his papers away. "But I have an emergency to attend to. Could we please reschedule for tomorrow?"

"Of course Akashi-Sama." One of them replied while all bowing low. "It sounds serious, I hope no one is hurt."

"So do I." Akashi admitted and strode from the room.

 **-Incident 7-**

"Moshi Moshi! Shin-Chan's phone~"

"Konichiwa! This is Momoi, I need to speak with Midorin. Its an emergency!"

"Momoi-San? I'll go get him now." Takao approached his teammate. "Shin-Chan~!" He yelled and grinned gleefully when the shooter jumped.

"Get out!"

"But Shin-Chan…" He whined.

"This is indecent! Get out!" Takao supposed he _was_ in the shower…

"But Momoi-San said it was an emergency…"

"Momoi?" Midorima eyes the phone in Takao's hand suspiciously. "Is that _my_ phone? You _answered_ my phone!?"

Takao looked completely unperturbed.

"Do you want a towel?"

"Just get out!"

"But Momoi-San said it was an emergency!"

"Give me my phone and _get out_!"

"Water and cell phones don't mix-"

" _OUT_!"

"Okay, okay…" He gave Midorima his phone and left the showers, going back to the locker room. He supposed if it really was an emergency he should keep his teasing to a minimum.

"Takao!" Midorima rushed into the locker room and started pulling on his clothes even with his body still wet. "Get the rickshaw. We need to go. Now."

"Wha-? Shin-Chan?"

" _Now_ , Takao!"

"H-Hai."

 **-Incident 7-**

Akashi, Momoi, Aomine and Midorima were all gathered inside Seirin High's school gates. Midorima had sent a reluctant Takao away once he had dropped him off.

There was a stillness that they had learnt to fear over the years of knowing Kuroko Tetsuya. It was too quiet and there was a sense of foreboding to the gym building to their left. They eyes it warily.

"So… what's the plan?" Aomine asked, shifting nervously.

"Get Tetsuya to Maji's." Akashi stated.

"Well duh! How?" Momoi quickly intervened before Akashi could tear Aomine a new one.

"Either we talk Tetsu'-Kun down and promise him a milkshake on us, or we restrain him and take him there by force." She said.

"Why couldn't we bring the milkshake to him?" Midorima asked. He acted put out but truthfully he was fearful of getting anywhere near an angry phantom without a milkshake peace offering.

"The closest Maji's is closed for refurbishment. The next nearest is over 5 miles away. I have sent for a car, but first we need to retrieve Tetsuya."

"I see. How far out is the car?"

"Another five minutes. Any more questions? Good, let's go."

 **-Incident 7-**

Seirin honestly did not know what demon they had awoken.

It had all begun innocent enough, with Riko and Hyūga treating the team to burgers as their school year came to a close. Riko's dad had driven them both to Maji's and they had loaded the car up with food and drink for the entire team to enjoy as a surprise instead of practice.

The team had genuinely been happily surprised and had sat on the floor of the gym together, chatting and eating while planning their holiday training.

Then Kagami, in a moment of clumsiness as he reached for what must have been his twentieth burger, bumper the near invisible Kuroko causing his milkshake to spill.

Seirin had always considered themselves the lucky ones. They prided themselves on have gained the single sane Miracle. He did not get swarmed my fangirls and act like a child. He did not obsess over horoscopes and act like a Tsundere. He did not skip practice and act arrogant. He did not constantly eat and threaten to crush those who annoyed him. And he did not believe himself _absolute_ and threaten disobedience with scissors…

In comparison, occasionally being caught unaware by the boy's presence, or rather lack of, was something they could happily live with.

Now, however, they were terrified!

Riko had been the first to comment, saying milkshakes were not healthy anyway. And it had all gone downhill from there.

Hyūga had been the first to fall. He had bravely stepped between Riko and Kuroko's new Ignite Pass Kai. From there it had been a slaughter in which those few that could had run and hid.

And this was the battle ground the three Miracles and their manager had walked in on.

The gym was deadly quiet and the florescent lighting overhead flickered ominously. And there were several unmoving bodies upon the ground. Midorima cautiously approached and checked on them. He identified Hyūga Junpei, Izuki Shin and Kiyoshi Teppei.

"They're all out cold." He whispered. "And we all know how." The others all observed the bruise on Izuki's face and Midorima lifted Hyūga and Kiyoshi's jerseys to reveal the bruises on their chest and stomach respectively. They recognised the distinctive marks left by Kuroko's Ignite Passes. Though these looked a little different, and they correctly assumed the 'Kai' twist was the reason.

"Where are the others?" Aomine whispered.

"This way." Akashi stated just as quietly, leading the way to the locker room.

Inside they found another, familiar body. Kagami was slumped against the lockers, his phone on the floor beside him.

Aomine did not know whether to feel sorry for the 'new light' or smug that he had, had to suffer the same fate as the Generation of Miracles.

Glancing around the locker room there was no sign of anyone else, Momoi even searched each shower stall.

"There are still seven members unaccounted for." Momoi informed the three basketball players.

A scream rang out from somewhere outside the locker room and then cut off abruptly.

"Shit," Aomine muttered and all four raced back out the door.

They found the unconscious forms of Furihata Kōki, Kawahara Kōichi and Fukuda Hiroshi in the corridor separating the gym from the school building. From the way they laid half in, half out of the supply closet it appeared Kuroko had found them hiding there.

"Poor guys." Aomine muttered as Midorima bent down to take in the damage.

"That brings us down to four. Mitobe Rinnosuke, Koganei Shinji, Tsuchida Satoshi and Aida Riko." Momoi softly said.

More screams ripped through the air.

"The school?" Midorima nervously looking down the corridor.

A sudden chill ran down their spines.

"G-g-g-g-g-g-guys…"

"Aomine?" Momoi asked with some concern.

"B-b-b-b-b-"

"Spit it out!" Midorima snapped.

"Tetsuya…" Akashi murmured and Momoi and Midorima froze. Slowly they turned round.

Before them stood what their nightmares were made of. Somehow Kuroko stood at the doors to the gym watching them with dark, empty eyes. And around him leaked a dark, _evil_ aura.

" _ **~Akashi-Kun~.**_ " The redhead tensed. " _ **~Aomine-Kun~.**_ " The ace whimpered and stumbled back a step. " _ **~Midorima-Kun~.**_ " The shooter adjusted his glasses with trembling hands. " _ **~Momoi-san~.**_ " The girl bit her lip, eyes wary.

They stood in silence for several seconds, unsure how to proceed.

" _ **~Are you here to agree with Riko-San, Akashi-Kun~?**_ " Kuroko asked, voice deceptively calm and monotonous. Akashi cleared his throat.

"Agree with your coach? Over what, Tetsuya?"

" _ **~That milkshakes are unhealthy~.**_ " Kuroko stated softly. His four old friends flinched, internally cursing the student coach for making matters worse. " _ **~It was quite hypocritical considering the entire team was eating burgers and drinking soda~.**_ " Kuroko went on. " _ **~Do you agree with Riko-San, Akashi-Kun~?**_ "

The redhead internally sweated at the question. He could not deny it as Kuroko already _knew_ his opinion.

"I agree it is hypocritical." He compromised.

" _ **~I see~.**_ " Kuroko blandly stated, turning his empty gaze upon Aomine next. " _ **~Are you here to challenge the Dim One, Aomine-Kun~?**_ "

"The dim…?" Momoi elbowed Aomine in the side

" _Kagamin_!" She whispered urgently.

"Ah! No! No, Tetsu'! I'm here to… erm…"

"We're here to see you, Tetsu'-Kun." Momoi announced as cheerfully as she dared. "We wanted to see if you were free to hang out…" She trailed of uncertainly. She had never been on the bad end of one of Kuroko's 'Incidents', nor did she want to be now.

" _ **~I see~.**_ " Kuroko repeated, not giving anything away. " _ **~And you, Midorima-Kun? Are you here to warn me Aquarius has poor luck today~?**_ "

"Well…" Midorima did not know what to say. It was true that Aquarius was second from last today, outclassed only by Leo in bad luck. And he was not about to lie, that would be blasphemy against Oha Asa!

"Shintarō is here to take you out and treat you to a vanilla milkshake, Tetsuya." Akashi interrupted before the shooter could say something to worsen the situation. Kuroko tilted his head to the side in what would have been a cute confused look if not for the dark aura that still leaked from him.

"That's right!" Momoi agreed, quickly catching on. "Midorin's lucky item today is to treat an Aquarius to a beverage!"

Midorima opened his mouth to disagree, but was interrupted by Aomine.

"Yeah, and me and Momoi thought we'd make an outing of it and we could all go hand out at Maji's."

Midorima shut his mouth and considered it. Was it blasphemy if he simply said nothing and did not correct them? He found whether it was or not, the price was acceptable to avoid having to deal with a volatile Phantom. He wisely kept quiet. _And_ subtly hid his lucky pink yoyo in his pocket.

There was a tense silence for a long minute till even Akashi was on the verge of fidgeting.

" _ **~Momoi and I~.**_ " Kuroko stated.

"W-what?" Momoi stuttered.

" _ **~It's 'Momoi and I', Aomine-Kun~.**_ "

"W-what?" This time the basketball ace stuttered out, confused.

"Yeah, Dai-Chan!" Momoi cried, catching on.

"Your grammar is terrible, Daiki." Akashi easily agreed.

"It's 'Momoi and I', not 'me and Momoi." Midorima reiterated.

"What? But guys-"

"Enough Daiki. Tetsuya, do you accept Shintarō's invitation?"

Without hesitation Kuroko nodded, and though the dark, milkshake deprived aura was there, it had shrunk back significantly.

" **Who will treat Nigō to a milkshake?** " He bluntly asked.

"Nigō?" Aomine questioned. "Your dog?"

A growl had the four of them on edge once more. Slowly they turned to find the dog behind them. It appeared he had come from inside the school from where the last screams had originated. They cringed at the sight of what they identified as a ripped sleeve in its jaw. It matched the uniform of Seirin High. But what terrified them most was the familiar dark aura permeating from him.

"G-good dog…?" Aomine tried. The hound barked viciously, taking a threatening step forward. Aomine yelped.

"Should dogs even drink-?" Midorima began, only to be interrupted.

"Daiki will treat Nigō. Right Daiki." Akashi calmly said, though in all honesty he was terrified! _Two_ Kurokos? Two _milkshake deprived_ Kurokos? Forget Tokyo, the entire county had been endangered this day when someone had spilt the milkshake of one Kuroko Tetsuya of Seirin High.

When he found out who had been responsible he would _end_ them.

"Right!" Aomine shouted. "I'll treat you to as many as you want!"

Like with Kuroko, the dog's dark aura shrank.

The chime of Akashi's phone brought all eyes upon the redhead. He brought out the device and checked the screen.

"The car has arrived." He stated. The others' relief was palpable. "Shall we?" He said, gesturing for them all to leave.

" **Come, Nigō.** " Kuroko called. The dog yipped and dropped the ripped sleeve. He scampered around the wary visitors and Kuroko picked him up and placed him upon his head.

They turned their matching eyes upon his four old friends.

" **We're thirsty.** " He stated.

The four rushed passed, though if asked Akashi would say he walked to the car perfectly calm.

 **-Incident 7-**

"Milkshake incident number seven averted." The redhead said later that evening after Aomine and Midorima's wallets had been emptied in exchange for an astounding number of milkshakes drunk over a retelling of the happening inside Seirin's gym. "Instigator: Kagami Taiga. Casualties: Seven by Tetsuya and a further four believed to have been caused by Nigō."

He paused and stared out the window of the car taking him back to his hotel for the night.

"If Tetsuya gains any more pets… Kami help us all."

 **-End of Incident 7-**

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